April Fools
© 1998 Fajita Musik

A true story about Bing's encounter with The Man.

Driving along on a sunny April Fool's day
wind in my hair and the sun on my face
tense and nervous about the state my license is in
it's suspended and I've expired plates

I'm doin' 'bout 65 when I see the sheriff's speed trap
good god, they're wavin' me over
what a day to be me
I can't believe this crap

so I tried to explain it
it seemed the cop entertained it
but now my wrists feel constrainment
looks like I'm headed for containment

sitting in the lock-up, this is not a mock-up
twenty guys waiting for the same damn phone
habituals, tourists with sticky fingers
with a singular goal: to get the hell home

there's a t.v. set in a second room
and all it plays is law shows
take a tray and review the day
enjoy the final minutes within your own clothes

there's felons on the left side
misdemeanors on the right side
here we are on the inside
hoping to connect with the outside


sitting in the middle of a concrete cell
I am a ne'er-do-well
funny how a club forms when you've broken just a few rules
me and all the April Fools

one unlucky cuss was busted on a warrant
another had a stack of tickets two feet high
two were caught with pockets full of loot
and arrested by Disney security guys

there's a wife-beater talking to a pot-grower
and a man who went crazy with a lawnmower
we all piss and moan at misfortune
trading stories around us as the night creeps slower

some'll talk and some'll sleep
and some'll stumble to their feet
every time the holding cell door creaks
hoping to get out of 33rd street


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